Going Underground

Flight gave a great description of our departure from Phoenix under the cover of darkness.  After I rejoined the land of the living, I took the opportunity to do some writing and gather my thoughts on our way out to Guadalupe Mountains National Park.  For a large stretch of our drive, there wasn’t much scenery to keep my attention (save the cute boy I married) and I escaped into the memories of Phase One of our travels.

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We arrived at this National Park in the nick of time and pulled into the second to last first-come, first-served parking slips for us to stay for two nights.  Two other RVs pulled in shortly after we.  Although initially this campground served as a base from which we could explore Carlsbad Caverns, I’m glad we took the opportunity to learn about this particular corner of the country while the girls completed another Junior Ranger Badge program.

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A little snapshot of what I learned…  Some eleventy billion years ago, this stretch of the desert was actually in the middle of a shallow three-basin sea.  The Delaware Basin served to form Capitan Reef at its edge, the remnants of which formed the foundation of the Guadalupe Mountains.  Although you’d never know it, apparently this park is riddled with sea creature fossils and shares its creation with its neighboring National Park, Carlsbad Caverns.  Unfortunately, we did not budget any hiking time into our brief stay, but some of the trails look to be pretty spectacular.  Next time.

As soon as the GMNP Visitor Center was open the following morning, we popped over so the girls could finish the requisite booklets to earn their badges.

Their favorite activity was a scavenger hunt through the exhibits.  In addition to the expected specimens of fox, skunk, skink, and desert rat, there was also a tarantula hawk on display.  The name might call to mind a shrewd bird of prey, but you’d be wrong.

Tarantula hawk

The tarantula hawk is instead a giant wasp that hunts these sizable arachnids, delivering a sting to paralyze them, after which they lay their eggs inside the immobilized spider who is then devoured alive from the inside out by the growing larvae.  Gross is the first word that comes to mind, yet falls so short of the gruesome reality.  Now, I am no fan of arachnids, especially big hairy ones, but even this seems over the top on the fiendish scale.  The tarantula hawk is especially nasty to its prey, but, should a human be stung by one, the peer-reviewed scientific advice is to lie down and start screaming.

I’m not making this up.

(And I am very thankful that I waited to further my knowledge of this species until I was very far from its natural habitat.)

Carlsbad Caverns boasted no such ghastly beasties.  Only bats. Lots of them.  Somewhere around 400,000 colony residents, in fact, comprised of 17 different species.  These numbers can surge to nearly double that during spring and fall migration seasons.  We did learn quite a bit about White Nose Syndrome, the fungus that is decimating the global bat population that has been referenced as part of the Sixth Extinction.  !!!  We saw neither hide nor free-tail of the legendary colony, likely because 1) during the day most of the colony sleeps in a cavern closed off to the public and b) we didn’t stay to see the daily mass exodus at dusk.  This picture from the National Park Service website makes that evolution look pretty cool.

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We arrived at the topside Visitor Center in the early afternoon and, at the recommendation of the Rangers at the front desk, ate lunch before we started the hike. Although there is a little café down below at the far end of The Big Room, we were informed that there would be slim pickings as the elevators down were out of service and, as the full assortment of nourishment could not be humped down the winding cavern switchbacks, they were offering little more than bottled water and Clif bars.  After filling our bellies, we made our way to the underworld entrance, pausing for a photo of the girls somewhere only they could get into, before we began our descent.

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And here’s a view looking back up.

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The going down was fairly easy despite the hairpin switchbacks.  I thought the return to the surface would be a little trickier, but hopefully not quite so laborious as the general population of earlier visitors made it seem.  Although some of them appeared to be on the other end of the fitness spectrum from American Ninja hopefuls, I realized that, despite our descent, we did start out about 4400′ above sea level. !!!  Because I was not yet focused on puffing my way back up, my thoughts were allowed to wander and I recalled the last time I had so gone underground.  I took the kids down to Luray Caverns in Virginia on the day of the last Presidential Election, and wondered again how symbolic the timing was of that excursion to the earth’s bowls.

As we descended lower, my ambling train of thought was rerouted to take in the immediate sites.  Pictured below are a collection of “soda straws,” hollow stalactites that break really easily when you try to pull them from the ceiling.

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Kidding!  I have no first-hand knowledge of this (and our Junior Rangers would have reported me if I did), but that sure looked to be the case. Our next pause in the descent was at the Whale’s Mouth, made up of smooth drapery formations.

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And this stalagmite is just plain ugly.

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No idea why it has been showcased by illumination, but there you have it.

We next found ourselves in the Hall of Giants where three massive speleothems grew from separate stalactites and stalagmites into columns eons ago.

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If you patiently wait a few millennia, you might see a few other such columns form.

What struck me most during our visit to the netherworld was the fact that everything we were seeing had been made (only a few formations remained active) in the absence of any light at all.  During our hike more than a million light bulbs were illuminating our path around the Big Room, drawing attention to the below formations, and it was a little trippy to consider that with the flick of a switch (and the failure of numerous generators), the caverns would again be in total darkness.  Everything we’d seen on our way to, from, and in the Big Room would then sit here entirely unobserved, as it had for innumerable years, slowly growing under no one’s watchful eyes.

When we stopped briefly to get some water at the subterranean café, I told Flight that you couldn’t pay me a million, trillion dollars to work there, especially if it meant I had to take the elevator up and down every day to get there.  A little aside, a friend recently told me that only the week prior to our visit, one of the two elevators still in service came to a halt mid-transit, stranding three people inside due to a mechanical failure.  Fortunately, all three were safely recovered and lifted by harness to safety.  To that I say, “Nopety, nope, nope, nope.”  If necessary, I’d hike in and out every dang time.

I recognized that it was time to climb back out of this enormous hole in the ground when I started imagining what would happen if the aforementioned magical switch were indeed flicked to OFF and/or backup generators failed, and suddenly there were no lights at all, for I knew I would have died a frightfully slow and slowly frightful death trying desperately to feel my way out of the cavern.

While regrouping over water, Flight briefed the kids on the basic rule of our ascent:  the kid who complains the least on the hike back up wins.  Detail-oriented WoodSprite asked, “Wins what?”  “Bragging rights,” was Flight’s response and we trudged our way upwards, weighing whether borderline innocuous comments such as “Wow, are my legs tired…” constituted a whiny point against the speaker or if it was simply stated as a point of information.

At last the lighting seemed even more otherworldly to me and I belatedly realized it was because we had made it to the “twilight zone,” where the natural light coming in from the entrance casts an eerie pall for a short distance (see below), beyond which it would become pitch black without mankind’s intervention.

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Most creatures have far greater sense than to wander in beyond the twilight zone (not so we) and I joyfully celebrated our return to broad daylight.

One last stop in the Visitor Center to swear in our Junior Rangers.

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And so that I might learn about my newest least favorite profession (I’m collecting them along this journey), Bat Guano Mining.  Considering the Caverns were discovered in 1898, local entrepreneurs wasted no time in capitalizing on the caves’ seemingly endless supply of bat guano, and mined the pungently rich fertilizer by lantern light from 1902 to 1958.  Um, no.  No, thank you.  The underworld gift shop/café position suddenly seemed far more desirable.

IMG_0659Overall, our time walking on the bottom of the former Delaware Basin (and well below!) was rich with sights we’d never before seen, learning about occupations I have zero interest in pursuing, and studying up on creatures I have no desire to meet.  Our brief exploration was absolutely time well spent, yet I find myself eager to move on to the Hill Country, putting a healthy distance between potential underground grid failures, tarantula hawks, and me.

Oenophilia

For the interested, here’s a list of the wines we drank during our week in Phoenix, including the “wine dinner” wines.  There may have even been a few more, but these were the ones I managed to document.  I won’t pretend to have any special knowledge of these wines beyond the very basics, but I can avow that they were spectacular.  All of them.

Yow!

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Re-launch!

[For any who may not know: We’re not using our real names, click here for details]

One of my major concerns about halting our progress back in December, was, as a friend put it, “re-establishing escape velocity.”  Not only had we attained a comfortable momentum in living on the road, but we were really enjoying ourselves.  Bringing it all to a screeching halt, re-integrating into our previous life, and then trying to start all over again a few months thereafter seemed beyond daunting when we tried to envision it.

It turned out to be considerably less daunting than we had imagined.  It helped not to think about it too much.  We basically just set a date and then forgot about it.  Which isn’t entirely accurate, but what we did do was pack our schedule so full with putting-the-house-on-the-market tasks that we really didn’t have time to consider anything else.

I did do some pre-planning and campsite reserving (we learned our lesson last time about staying ahead of that), so I was mentally ahead of Tacco in that particular arena at least.  But two weeks, one week, even down to just a couple days ahead of our departure date it felt absolutely nothing at all like we were about to upend our lives again.  Several times we stopped whatever we happened to be busy with, looked at each other, and tossed out something to the effect of “wait… check me on this, this can’t be right.  Are we seriously leaving this house for good and living on the road again in xx days?”

It was right though.  And if things go as planned, not just the house, but the life.  Everything.  Crazy.

Preparations were orderly right down to the last day – anyone surprised?  Our intention was to fly from DC to Los Angeles via a connection in Boston, leaving early on Wednesday, March 21st.  We had emptied and unplugged our fridge, made reservations for a fun dinner out on Tuesday night, and figured we would have the rest of the night to tie up any loose ends prior to bolting for the airport at 5:30AM.  But I didn’t intend to have any loose ends to tie up.

And then… here’s the weather forecast for our departure — the day we had planned on for the past three months:

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Yes, biggest snowfall event of the year for Maryland.  Wintry mix, freezing rain, sleet, then snow and more snow.  10” forecast, and oh by the way that storm was set to move up toward Boston immediately thereafter.

The cascade of flight cancellations began on Tuesday morning, and within an hour or so the entire schedule out of BWI and DCA for Wednesday was gone.  There go plans A through K.  Tacco and I had multiple flip-flopping (and each time conflicting, amusingly enough) gut reactions about how to proceed.  The one general tack was to do whatever we possibly could to get to Boston ASAP, get a hotel for the night, then escape to the West Coast before the storm hit Boston.  The other was to relax, have a nice dinner, watch a movie, and don’t even think about leaving Maryland until the storm cleared and the scads of displaced passengers had worked their way through the system.  We didn’t know how long that would last, but my best guess was Friday.  The latter approach held considerable appeal, given that leaving Tuesday afternoon/night rather than the following morning would force us into crisis mode with respect to getting the house ready to leave, and there was no guarantee we wouldn’t get stuck anywhere along the way, including at the airport in DC (we didn’t have a car), or at the hotel in Boston.  Yet we did have a plan, and people expecting us, and the kids wanting to scramble on Joshua Tree’s rock piles on Friday (no space available next week)… shouldn’t we at least try?

Oh, and also – here’s the Southern California weather forecast for our arrival.  Southern California!  Thursday was supposed to be our get-everything-in-order day and they’re calling for a maelstrom.

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Sparing you the gory details of our pulling off getting the house ready and the MANY interim plan changes, I’ll tell you that we found ourselves at DCA (Washington National Airport – sorry, can’t get used to spelling out airport names) at about 9:30PM on Tuesday night awaiting a flight to Boston now delayed until 12:30AM.  And here I should clarify this process briefly – when flying standby the game is to figure out which flights or combinations thereof can get you to or near your destination, and then to check the “loads” (seats available) on these flights, through various means, so that you can determine whether you’ll actually get a seat.  Flying on your own airline is preferable because it’s free, but other airlines are possibilities too, just less desirable because there’s a fee involved and the means for load-checking aren’t as accurate.  Where it gets hopelessly complex is during periods of cancellations, because all those displaced passengers are re-booking in real time and they all have priority over you.  So a wide open flight can become a fully booked flight within minutes, not to mention the fact that everything gets delayed, so you have to start looking at whether connections will work, and then on top of that you start getting crew availability problems.  Anyway, back to our now-after-midnight hop to Boston.  After deicing the freezing drizzle and ice pellets from our wings and braving the bumpy ride, we pulled into Boston at just shy of 2AM and made our way through the empty airport toward our hotel van, armed with the newfound knowledge that the next day’s flight to LA that we had been banking on had filled up with revenue customers somewhere between 11 and midnight.  So that was now off the table.

Woodsprite had a meltdown in the airport, and I so wish we had pictures, because it was so her…  she was dead tired (of course) and dragging her roll-aboard through the airport like the rest of us, and she just flippin’ lost it.  Just started crying angrily and inconsolably, but kept dragging the rollaboard through the airport.  It wasn’t a minor meltdown by any stretch of the imagination but it was so civilized how she waved everyone off and just kept doing what she was doing.  “I’m 6 years old and it’s 2AM for Pete’s sake, just get away from me and let me cry my head off while I do this bag drag, will you??”

Plans L though Y or so died quick deaths between our DCA time and my extra hour awake in the hotel by the light of my laptop.  But plan Zulu prevailed, and at 10:36AM we jumped (still flying standby, miraculously) onto an American Airlines flight to LA.  How this flight had open seats I have no idea.  It even surprised the gate agent, who advised us, prior to taking a look at our flight’s status, that we shouldn’t bother our checking bags because “everything’s full today.”  Everything except this flight I guess!  We even sat together.  Victory!!

Here’s our (very very) rough plan for the last phase of our journey.

Da Plan

See you from the road.

Interlude

If you had told me back in December how quickly and effortlessly I would adapt to living back in our Maryland house, to the point where I nearly forgot what we had been doing for the past four months, I would have said you’re insane.  “No way.  It’s all changed.  We’ll always feel out of place in that house now… “

Not so.  It was frighteningly easy to slip right back into the ordinary, even though several things about our winter back in our house were entirely different from any time before.  For one, we continued to travel.  Christmas in Chicago, the first week of January in Los Cabos celebrating my parents’ 50th anniversary, a week in Bend… all things that would have been much more difficult to do had the kids been in school.  Tacco wrote an extensive missive covering that time frame, so I’ll forgo the blow by blow.

Which leads me to another significant difference, which is the kids still being homeschooled.  We did end up putting the girls back into school for about 6 weeks once we learned that they were welcome to just sort of show up and disappear again.  It made things easier on us homeschool-wise and getting-the-house-prepared-to-sell-again-wise, but was also valuable for the girls to see their friends again and re-experience the classroom setting.

And then the most significant difference of all, which was our living there with one foot out the door.  We never quite completely unpacked our “stuff” or sprawled out into the house again, which was by design.  Our intention was to look at the winter as a time to catch our collective breath, learn a bit more about where we would end up, and most importantly, get the house back on the market in a way that would actually result in a sale, but not to really “move back in” in any sort of meaningful way.

Despite all this and a looming launch date (we decided early on that we would aim for a departure on the first day of spring) however, everything became very normal, very quickly.  My own bathroom, shower and washer/dryer… throwing dishes in the dishwasher… falling asleep to mindless TV in the basement with Tacco after the kids were asleep… seeing local friends again…  there was no sense of any of that being out of the ordinary.  All of which led to very mixed feelings when we found ourselves a week or two out from departure.

We did accomplish a good bit.  We saw more of the local area (though it’s never enough), and probably most importantly, we took our ski trip to Bend, which got us most of the way down our road toward a permanent home.

We also got our house back on the market.  That part was harrowing and more than a little frustrating.  We did a thorough post mortem of the unsuccessful seven month stretch on the market and think we came up with some factors (other than price, obviously that’s always a thing, if not the thing) that kept it from selling.  We did a lot of work on the house, even though we knew it wouldn’t get us any more money in the sale.  That was a bit painful.  Who knew there was so much more to do, and why were we only doing it now?  We also think we have the right realtors on the job.  Though we didn’t have personal issues with the previous ones, we realized in retrospect that not only should we have conducted several more interviews before hiring them, but we should have been extremely clear in our expectations (not only communicating them, but also knowing precisely what they were!) and brought that to the interview table and to our early interactions.  This new team seems to be a great fit though, and we like the listing and the sales plan we’ve created together.  Hopefully the frustration is over.  Because I have to admit, we’re uprooting again in pretty much the exact same situation we were when we started the first time, which is an unsold house.  As I alluded to in post number one, that was never the plan, and is not sustainable.  Even though we know where we want to be and when, it doesn’t work if we don’t sell our old house.  And we can’t afford to “give” it away, so lowball offers and crazy discounts are off the table.  It should all be very disconcerting.  Yet somehow it doesn’t feel that way.

Overall, it doesn’t seem like we’re “getting back” to it, it feels like starting all over again.  I truly don’t remember what it’s like to be out on the road.  Here are the good things though: we’re ahead of the planning part this time and know about the pitfalls thereof; we have an endpoint and a time frame for it, which cuts down on the flailing; and the kids are in a much better space – despite normal mixed feelings, they’re excited to return and seem to have done a lot of growing up in the last three months.

So have we I guess.

Bent (again)

We concluded part one of our journey having less idea of where we wanted to settle than when we started, despite one of our stated goals having been to start nailing that decision down.  Instead of winnowing the field of potential endpoints, we expanded it.

Consequently we planned a few winter weeks away from home in front-running destination areas – auditions more or less.  The first was Bend.  At some point Tacco and I realized that we were looking hard at ski towns and envisioning season passes and play dates on the hill, yet 2 of our 3 kids had never skied, with the 3rd having only done it one day, many years ago.  Moving into our shiny new ski town and discovering that our kids hated skiing would be a buzzkill, to say the very least.  So we planned a ski week, and opted to do it in Bend as we’d been impressed with it in both summer and fall, but figured winter might be the true test.

The second trip we planned was two weeks in New England, renting houses in Portsmouth, NH and Portland, ME, with me flying a few trips from there to get a feel for going to work without having to commute to work via plane.  Since I’ve been an airline pilot, I’ve never had the pleasure of driving to work and back.

We rented a house near the river there for the first week in February and jumped on a plane to Portland.

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Bend is tricky to get to.  There’s an airport, but counting on standby flying via connecting flights on airlines other than my own didn’t sound prudent or fun, so we rented a minivan for the week and made the 3 hour drive across the Cascades once we arrived.  As tends to happen, our initial five or so plans crumbled due to external factors, with the net effect being a very late arrival in Portland and my mainlining caffeine to keep me alert for the drive over the mountains.  We didn’t see much – me due to darkness and the others due to slumber.

Here’s an overview of the geography, by the way.  I think when most people picture Oregon, they picture green, wet Portland and the Willamette River valley (and maybe the coast), which is basically the upper left corner of this map, bordered by the Cascades in the East and Eugene in the South.  Bend is outside of that, and quite different in many ways.Bend overviewAnd here’s a more close-up satellite view.  The distances are short — downtown Bend to Mt. Bachelor is about twenty miles.  And it’s pretty easy to see the color difference between the wet (west) side of the Cascades and the dry (east) side.  Bend is more or less high desert, with the associated climate, but with lots of ponderosa pines, juniper, and volcanic rock.

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Our third visit started strong yet again.  More great food, world class local beer and cider, walks along the river… while I preferred the summer vibe with bikes and water toys everywhere you turned, this was still entirely decent.  Better than decent.IMG_0674

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That said, the ski aspect of the week started sketchy bordering on disasterously.  A family ski week from long distance is an expensive proposition no matter how you try to mitigate it.  After hours of online searching and several phone calls resulted in lots of information that didn’t help us, we opted for an essentially un-discounted 3 of 5 day ski pass for everyone, a 5 day ski rental for the kids, and day-by-day half day lessons for the three of them.  For this we spent far more we than did for our (very nice) rental house, with no guarantee of enjoyment.  What’s more, the weather looked to be uncooperative.  It had been a particularly mild Winter in Bend, and the snow on Mt. Bachelor was more akin to what you would normally see in late April than the dead of winter.  The temperatures for the week were forecast to hover about ten degrees above freezing, with the possibility of rain.  This was not skiing weather.  Still, it’s pointless to stress over that which you can’t control, so we chose what we thought would be the best three ski days out of our week and rolled with it.

Our first ski day saw us teetering on the edge of fiasco.  As anyone who has ever taken kids on a first-time ski outing can attest, the best way to ensure that they hate skiing for life is to put them on the mountain in bad conditions on day one.  Often weather alone is enough to ruin them, but throw in a few more unfavorables and you’re effectively doomed.

First of all, we were inside a cloud.  Literally.  Zero visibility and damp damp damp.  The snow surface was icy, and there was neither snow nor clearing in the forecast.  Not auspicious.

Secondly, we spent about an hour in the buy-your-tickets area.   Despite having pre-purchased our passes, their computer wasn’t playing along and Tacco made her way through three employees, the first two of whom had to throw up their hands and ask for help.  Having worked in a lift ticket office in the past, Tacco was calm and understanding the entire time, but the kids became increasingly less serene.  Thereafter came the rental experience.  It went as well as could be expected, but putting ski gear on kids for the first time is always going to be a little bit fraught.

After we emerged at last, we found that we had about 45 minutes prior to the beginning of the afternoon lesson, so I decided I’d put on my ski instructor hat and show them the absolute basics.  Side stepping, edges, duck walking, getting up when you fall… Let’s call that strike three.

I knew this was a bad idea.  Everyone knows this is a bad idea.  You let the ski instructor instruct your kids.  Duh.  And yet… I still did it.  Within 15 minutes I managed to get all three kids splayed on the snow, completely frustrated with me, skiing, life, everything.  Keeper was muttering about how many actual minutes this ski day would take so that he could count down how much longer he’d have to endure the torture.

This is how we left our kids with the instructor.

We took off to catch a few runs in a futile attempt to make the cost of our lift tickets worthwhile.

Visibility got no better on the mountain, and the best we could possibly do was pick our way down at a crawl.  I tried goggles on, goggles off, sunglasses on, sunglasses off, sunglasses under goggles (the sunglasses are Rx, so skiing without them puts me at an immediate disadvantage acuity-wise)… everything either fogged up or got so covered with tiny water droplets that they became useless.  I ended up mostly just going bare-eyed and rubbing them a lot.  And did I mention it was icy?

Then the rain began.  Lightly, but rain nevertheless.  Strike five.  Or six.  At this point it was tough to tell how many strikes, but the whole endeavor took on sort of a zen aspect to it.  Almost relief.  We were not going to be a skiing family, we would not live in Bend, and we were now free to calmly forget about the money we had spent here and just enjoy the rest of the week without any expectations.  Being inside of a cloud while wearing a helmet and goggles and a big jacket makes going zen very easy, incidentally.  Your world seems very small.

About an hour into the two-hour lesson we decided to ski to the bottom to check in on the kids, just for “fun.”  At the bottom we found three empty pairs of skis sitting in the snow.  “Ah-ha, they broke the instructor.”  On a whim though, I poked my head into the yurt where I figured they’d be sitting, half hoping they wouldn’t see me so that they couldn’t cry for mercy and beg to be taken back to the car.  Instead what I saw was the four of them (kids + instructor) sipping hot chocolate and chatting happily.  Huh.  “Oh hey dad, we’re just taking a break!”  Oooo-K.  The instructor met my gaze without a “please help me” look, so I quickly told them we’d see them in an hour and headed back out.  They weren’t skiing, which threatened to destroy my serene state with images of how expensive that hot chocolate they were drinking would turn out to be, but I swiftly brushed the thought away and joined Tacco to attempt another few runs.  Or “runs,” as it were.  Whatever.  Sunk costs are sunk costs.  The kids would hate skiing but at least they weren’t miserable right at this moment, and I was free to more or less enjoy my last bit of adult time on the mountain while pondering where else in the country we might want to live.

We returned to collect the kiddos post-lesson ready to concede defeat, grab a warm drink somewhere, dry off and get toasty, and figure out what we’d do with the remaining ski days we would clearly not be using.  What we found was something entirely different.  I don’t use the word “miracle” lightly, if at all.  But SOMETHING went down.  All three kids were happily making turns on the small ski-school area’s slope, laughing, waving at us, and asking if we were coming back tomorrow and if not, could we please please please??  Wait, what?!  “Skiing is AWESOME Dad!”

[insert sound of needle scraping across record here]  Wow.  Wow!  What just happened?!?

So that’s how the rest of the week went.  Though it didn’t snow, the sun came out on the mountain for the remainder of our time and the conditions were Spring-ish, with icy mornings giving way to softer afternoons.  The kids took two more lessons each and did extremely well.  By day three Keeper went all the way up the mountain with us and skied down some intermediate slopes with no problems.  Firebolt did almost the same, and will be ready to join us next time.  And Woodsprite is raring to get back out there.

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But it was even better than that.  The kids fell in love with Bend.  I did not expect this.  Even if we discovered that they enjoyed skiing, I had anticipated resigned neutrality at best.  Not so.  Even Keeper, who, ever since we started this adventure in July has held fast to his “I do not want to leave Maryland, but if we absolutely have to, then I’d be OK with xxx… maybe” sentiment, surprised us with “I want to move here right now!”  The biking, the neighborhoods, the skiing, the river, the restaurants, the weather – hit hit hit hit hit hit.

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It was odd to find myself in the position of being the least enthusiastic family member, given that I’d been the one intrigued by Bend’s possibilities for the past ten years or so, before anyone else had even been there.  I still had concerns about the commute to work and the unnecessary time away from home that would impose upon me and the family.  There’s no getting around that.  Fortunately I was able to meet up with a friend and ex-squadron-mate there (one of only two people we know in town), who now flies for Southwest and commutes to Oakland.  We’re fairly like-minded and in a similar life situation, so I value his take on things.  What I expected him to give me was a list of pros and cons that was pretty balanced in the aggregate.  What I got instead was the story of how he worked through that list, to include making the decision to move back to California and going so far as to fly the family out there with the intention to buy a house there, only to discover almost immediately that they were crazy to move away from paradise and flying right back.  Basically he was overwhelmingly positive, and made the case, which has always been compelling to me, that loving where you live is more than worth any minor inconveniences involved in being there.

I’ve made that decision again and again throughout my life, trading ease and convenience for quality of experience.  When I lived in the Pensacola area for flight school, I rented a house near the training base in Milton, having been convinced (or maybe spooked) by several stressed-out students that I needed to be close by and have zero distractions if I was going to succeed at this.  It was miserable.  Milton was, that is.  It took a late-night beer-fueled conversation with good friends in a similar living situation for us to conclude that that reasoning was antithetical to our natures and that we would all be better served by living on one of the Pensacola area’s pristine white-sand beaches, even if it meant a 45 minute commute (it did).  We moved with only two months left in Pensacola and it became two of the most memorable months of my life.

When I was based in Whidbey Island I was told by several fellow Navy folks that I emphatically did not want to live in Anacortes to the north and should instead stick to the Navy town of Oak Harbor because I wanted to be close to base and did “not want to deal with that bridge!” (Deception Pass bridge, which spans the gap between Fidalgo and Whidbey Islands).

This bridge.

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Anacortes is the most beautiful place I’ve ever lived, and contrary to being something to “deal” with, the Deception Pass bridge always gave me a peaceful sense of separation between my home and work lives.  The occasional pods of orcas that frolicked in the water beneath it didn’t hurt either.

I could keep providing examples, but my point is that every time I hesitated and went through this same sort of calculation, I ended up making the decision to take the route that was more inconvenient but provided greater personal rewards, and every time I’ve looked back, I’ve been completely convinced that I made the right call.

I think that might be where we are with Bend.  Right now it’s a 90% solution, and for the first time we all seem to have a “this feels right” sense that has been heretofore lacking.  The kids are all in, Tacco is, let’s call it 94% in (she graduated in ’94 and USNA types are weird about their graduation year… heh), and I’m almost there.  We may have found a home.  I’m certain there will be days when I’ll be stuck in commuting hell, missing soccer games or forcing Tacco to cancel commitments because I’m stuck in San Francisco or LA.  But, theoretically at least, we’re good with that.  It does indeed feel right.  Now to find an actual house within our home.

Oh, and by the way, we ended up canceling the New England trip.  The more we looked at it, the more it now seemed pointless compared to the time and expense.  Sorry New England, you’re gorgeous and we may have carved out quite a life in one of your small towns with me happily driving to and from work, but it looks like Bend may have swooped us.

Crunch Fix

I wanted to give the resolution to our little tree limb encounter its own post as it’s instructive.  At least it was for me.  I had no idea how much fiberglass repair costs!  I also had only vague ideas about several other things about which I should’ve been an expert.

What I should’ve done was this:  Call my insurance company immediately upon seeing the damage.  Taken a picture of it.  Allow them to find and make an appointment with an adjuster based on where we would be over the next couple weeks.  Let the adjuster work with their preferred maintenance facility to get the hole fixed.  Pay the deductible and move on.

What I did was this:  Looked at the jagged hole in our roof and said “shoot, that’s just a fiberglass repair, no big deal.  We’ll get it fixed when we can.”  I was thinking San Diego since we had a non-RV place already booked, but I didn’t find a repair place or make an appointment right away.  My gross wag on what the cost would be, based on absolutely nothing at all, was a couple hundred dollars.  I even looked into doing it myself, but reluctantly opted not to when I saw how involved it would be, particularly given that it was a curved surface that had crunched.  Thankfully.  That would’ve been an unmitigated disaster.

Turns out I wasn’t even close with my cost estimate.  When we finally got down to San Diego and got the official estimate (after significant logistical aerobatics involving a rental mini-van I picked up at the airport), it came out to somewhere just north of $2700. !!!  That changes things.

As that’s not the type of money we can afford to just toss around, I made a quick call (aggressively encouraged by Tacco, who recognized the time criticality far better than I had) to USAA in order to see if I could start a claim.  Understandably, they asked why I hadn’t called immediately when the incident happened, a question for which I had no good answer.  I had made things quite difficult for them by squeezing this repair into a short time-frame box and already selecting a repair shop.  Evidently insurance adjusters tend to need a few weeks lead time to work their magic.

Well, I need to give a shout out to USAA in this case.  They came through for me enormously.  There was no small portion of luck involved, too – it just so happened that the USAA insurance adjuster that this repair shop liked to work with had had a cancellation that morning and furthermore was in the area, so was able to pop by and do his thing with Davista.  Had this not been the case, we’d have been stuck either paying for the full repair (I presume) or sticking around in a hotel in San Diego until we could get everything sorted out, likely well into November.

So it worked out!  Despite my best efforts, we picked up Davista at the end of our San Diego time with a beautifully repaired roof and paid only a deductible.  Please don’t do what I did.

Two Months In

1 Oct Trip

We have now been living on the road for two months.  We’re clearly not quite caught up with respect to chronicling our travels, but I thought it would be a good idea to give a general status update from where I sit – what we call a “howgozit” in aviation-speak.  Fair warning: I suspect this missive will be more for me than it will be for any reader who happens not to be me.

Above is our progress to date — places we’ve overnighted in red, points of interest we’ve visited in blue.  It gets a little jumbled in the Yellowstone / Grand Teton area — lots in a small space.  You can see we’ve made it further than we’ve written about, but that’s upcoming.

[Quick reset on the fact that we’re not using our actual names here, if you’re just joining us.  Take a look here for details]

A few bullet points:

  • We really don’t need much clothing. So far I’ve mostly cycled through a half dozen T-shirts, a few pairs of shorts, two pairs of jeans, a fleece, and a flannel jacket/shirt (plus the attendant underwear/socks).  Half of what I brought hasn’t been touched, though I’m not ready to jettison any of it yet.
  • 5-6 hours of driving in a day is a sweet spot.
  • Eating well on the road isn’t as tricky as I had imagined, but requires significant forethought and some effort.
  • The bikes are crucial; the kayaks are probably an unnecessary and somewhat space-hogging luxury. We’ve only used them twice, and both places we used them we could’ve easily rented instead.
  • We opted against a dedicated “screens” policy for the kids, reasoning that we would need to make too many exceptions to it while on the road, and that a lifeline to the kids’ friends would be crucial to their sanity. We’re now questioning this decision, as the draw of random YouTube videos and mindless games seems to be too much for them to overcome; asking them to moderate themselves appears to be ineffective and probably unfair.
  • We’re spending significantly less money on the road, even with gas, lodging, and entertainment included, than we were while living in Annapolis. Here’s the surprising part – we may even be spending less while still owning / paying for the house.  I don’t have enough data to say that conclusively, but if it’s true then I guess that means we may not be able to afford to stop traveling!  I’m joking about that part.

One thing I’ve found surprising has been how little it feels like my lifestyle has changed.  Clearly it has.  Yet there seem to be no outward signs of it.  That might be at least in part a function of my normal professional life, which has me living out of a suitcase in various hotels for half of each month.  I suspect the rest of the family feels the difference far more acutely than I.

When I envisioned how the trip would be, though, I pictured a completely different “feel” in the day to day.  I looked forward to simplification — to having days with nothing to do other than hang out with my family.  I also imagined being able to radically remake my lifestyle almost on a whim.  In the normal state of affairs, I find it far too easy to get stuck in a rut of days that look oppressively similar to each other and a feeling of never having enough time.  I pictured being able to spend days productively and exactly how I wanted to.

Very little of this has materialized.  At least not in a “handed to me on a silver platter” way.  I don’t mean to present this as a negative; it’s more that I’m realizing what now seems obvious as I write it — that reworking my habits, if that’s something I want to do, will require a deliberate effort, just as it would if I weren’t traveling.  So I guess I have to work for it.  Shoot.

There are some unanticipated, extenuating circumstances here at month two, to be sure.  Not selling the house is the biggest.  In some sense it’s a safety net knowing we have a fully furnished home with most of our stuff inside awaiting us in Maryland should we decide we’re done traveling.  But it’s not what we envisioned, it adds a layer of complexity to everything, and it hampers our ability to plan ahead.  As of now we don’t know what we are going to do come November.  I don’t like the idea of having to, as a friend termed it, “re-attain escape velocity” in the Spring if we spend the Winter back in our house in Annapolis.  But that may be where we are.

In general, I’ve just found that there’s still a ton of planning involved in this lifestyle – where we go next, where we stay, what we’re going to eat, how to maximize our day given that we’ll only be in most areas for a very short time, who do we try to visit, how do we educate our kids, etc.  While we could almost certainly get by ignoring all of the above and playing things by ear, there would be many negative side effects that would more than cancel out the positives – several nights spent in WalMart parking lots (a fate we’ve managed to avoid up to now), far too many burgers, quesadillas, and last-minute nearest-restaurant outings, multiple missed opportunities in amazing settings… just writing all that stresses me out.  “Seat of the pants” is great for a single 20-something or a young couple, but its utility for our situation is limited.  The net result being that we’re about as busy as we ever were, just in a different way.  Again, not a gripe, just an unforeseen observation.

The living in close quarters has not been an issue for me, at least not obviously so.  There are times when I feel hemmed in and I jump on my bike or head elsewhere for a short time.  But not often.  And I don’t long for a stable home that doesn’t move — at least not yet.  Motion suits me.

All that is me, though.  Yawn.  What’s more interesting, and what Tacco and I spend a good chunk of our time trying to discern, discussing and mulling over, is how this is affecting the kids.  By far the most unsettling aspect of this year of travel are the mental meanderings about whether we’re helping to enrich their lives or undermine them.  Obviously we’re banking on the former or we would never have attempted this.  But with this much disruption there’s more than the usual faith required.  There are higher highs and lower lows, and we’re pretty sure that it will take significant time and distance before we ever hear the phrase “I’m so glad we did that…”

Keeper is fairly direct.  In any given moment and while we’re doing our “fun stuff,” he is, or at least appears, perfectly content.  However, when asked by anyone how he likes the lifestyle and the trip he has been telling them/us point blank “I don’t.”  When he first started responding this way we tried to unpack it a bit with him to see both what sorts of things we could improve or reframe, and how seriously we should take his discontent.  One easy fix was buying a curtain rod and curtain for his sleeping area so that he could feel more like his space was his own.

It’s also difficult to tease out what parts of his dissatisfaction are definitely trip-related and which parts are general adolescence-related.  There’s certainly some grass-is-greener-ism going on and we’re trying to point that out when we can, but of course it’s almost impossible to see from inside it.  He’s having amazing experiences and he recognizes that, but he misses his friends from Maryland and imagines an idealized picture of what our lives would look like if we were still there.  That’s tough.

Homeschooling started out tricky for him, but I think he’s starting to find his stride with it.  Initially he told us several times that he simply couldn’t take it seriously, and he wasn’t giving it his best effort.  That has changed.  I don’t want to declare victory quite yet, but I think he’s starting to see how much more quickly he can move in this format, and how convenient it is to have all of your teachers’ attention all the time.

Firebolt’s response has been a bit more nuanced.  She appears to be in her element much of the time and is thriving under the homeschool format, yet when we asked her recently what she thought of our lifestyle she answered that she didn’t like it either.  Surprised, I reminded her of the amazing morning we had just finished hunting agates on the beach and the bike ride we had taken the day before, all the things we’d seen so far, etc.  She laughed and answered that yes yes, she knows, and that she loves all of that, but that it just “doesn’t feel right.”  Then she repeated it: “A house on wheels.  It doesn’t feel right.”  All the while smiling.  Intriguing, coming from an eight-year-old.

More than anything I think she would just like more personal interaction.  She’s our unabashed extrovert, and playing with random kids at various playgrounds isn’t giving her the fix she craves.

Woodsprite is just Woodsprite.  She’s just on the cusp of being able to recall all this, and I think it will reduce to a happy blur for her when she looks back years later, but for now she’s just all enthusiasm and love.  I’m not worried about her at all.

One huge thing we realized recently, and it’s likely a rather large oversight, is that we haven’t put nearly enough effort into bringing our kids into the planning fold.  They haven’t necessarily known where exactly we were, how long we’ve intended to be there, where we’re going in the future, and what we would like to see and do.  Perhaps more crucially, they haven’t even really known what is on tap for the day each morning.  They wake up not knowing what to expect, so they eat breakfast, do their schoolwork, and go straight to their screens until we tell them otherwise.  It’s become clear that all three of them need more structure.  It will require considerable effort on our part, but we’re currently working on some way to visually communicate to them each morning both what we’re planning for the day and what’s coming up.  On top of that we’d like to have some sort of “where we are, where we’ve been, where we’re going” map that they can look at just about any time.

I’ll wrap this up by saying that I actually think things are going quite well.  I’ve focused more on doubts and missteps because they’re on my mind as I take inventory, but also because they provide a contrast to the day-to-day stories which might come across as non-stop adventure.

I knew from the beginning that we’d be making mid-course corrections constantly and likely wouldn’t feel fully comfortable with what we were doing until we were just about done.  The first phase of the trip was always going to look different from the rest, by design (I took quite a bit of time off work and we wanted to take advantage of late Summer / early Fall’s great weather in the West).  Lots of movement, tons to see, lots of activity.  We’ve done that well so far and have chalked up some amazing family experiences.  This will morph as we hit mid-Fall.  The average stay-put time will probably stretch to a week or longer if we keep going.  I’ll be away for work more, which I don’t like, but the rest of the family will have more time to catch their collective breath.

We are, however, living in the Instant Pot.  Fortunately we realized this fairly early on.  The Instant Pot, if you’ve read some of Tacco’s posts, is the multi-mode cooking appliance that has a pressure cooking function.  There’s a relief valve on top that you open to release the pressure inside after the meal’s done.  We’re still searching for that valve in Davista.  Sometimes we find it briefly, but evidently it’s mobile and it’s camouflaged.  In the meantime, the awareness that we’re in the Instant Pot is almost as helpful as reliable access to the release valve would be, as long as we’re able to remember it.

The Angel Speaks

Occasionally when I am in a treatment room with a patient on the table, I will hear very clear instructions on a recommended course of action. It’s as though someone is standing just behind my right shoulder and offering up specific treatment protocols. These recommendations sometimes fall in line with and serve to confirm the direction I was heading, but more often than not they approach an underlying problem through an unconventional opening, one that I hadn’t yet considered. Either way, I have learned that I should always listen to this voice, because, invariably, when I do, something monumental unfolds for the person in treatment.

I have to tell you, it’s pretty cool to have an Angel (?) whispering in my ear and I pray that I am always open to hearing what is said.

This particular Angel sometimes follows me out of the clinical setting and will also make suggestions that I need to hear in whatever situation is at hand. For example, I have heard that I need to reach out to a particular student, to check in on a fellow instructor, to be sure I grab the Go Bag or my shell or my hiking boots, etc. I know that, even outside the treatment space, should the Angel speak, I need to take heed as it always goes better when I do.

We made our way back up the mountain to move Davista to another site at Jordanelle. As we were setting up camp and Flight was packing for his next trip, I noted that the formal contract to sell out house had hit my inbox via DocuSign. I pulled up the contract getting ready to start digitally signing when I heard from over my right shoulder, “You should Google the buyer’s name.” I thought, “Really?” followed closely by, “Do Angels Google?” Maybe, maybe not, but I knew I should listen to the guidance.

So, I Googled away. And I learned that our would-be buyer had 22 (give or take) bankruptcy cases on record, dating back to 2002 and the most recent of which was dismissed three weeks ago. ????!? While I do not run a financial institution, nor do I presume to understand the inner workings of the enigma known as the real estate lending market, I’m fairly certain such a record would make it pretty tricky to land a mortgage to purchase our house. Hmmm…

I pulled Flight away from his suitcase packing and over to look at my computer screen. “Um, look at what I found about our buyer…” He took a quick look and offered, “Hoo boy, let me do a little more digging on my way to Boston…”

It’s important to note all that was going on at the time this information was added to our processing mix. Flight was packing up to go away for a few days. After parking Davista we had maybe 20 minutes to do a “quick turn,” meaning we had a very short window of time to all clean up for dinner with Flight’s aunt, uncle, and another set of cousins and we were running a little tardy to the next Family Dinner party.

On our way back down the canyon, we brought this information to our realtor (it was now into the evening on Labor Day) and asked whether or not this might be a red flag for the proposed deal; this was uncharted territory for us after all. He thought it shouldn’t matter especially much as long as they were able to obtain financing. My thoughts, “Okay, but from whom?!” Quite the enigma, the housing lending world.

While Flight was commuting to work that evening, he did a few searches that readily peeled back the onion, resulting in a discovery of no fewer than 56 criminal cases against our prospective buyer that were listed in the Maryland court system alone. Most of them had been closed (I’m still not sure what that means exactly), one with jail time sentenced (but maybe not served?) and several were still open, with court and/or hearing dates in a few weeks hence. The majority of these were for forgery, but there was a smattering of other felonies as well. Multi-talented, our prospective buyer, but apparently not very good at any of them.

Considering my exposure to this way of life is limited to what I saw in “Catch Me If You Can,” I’m afraid I still don’t know where to file this information.

Flight took a screen shot of this freely accessible, open-to-the-public, information all readily available online and sent it to our realtor. We thought it might be of critical importance since the buyer’s agent was also in the same office and wondered if they knew about any of this history. This bit of information gave them considerable pause, and we let it sit for a day in order let them process it as well.

With just the news of the bankruptcies our intention had been to require a third party to verify the buyer’s loan eligibility. We didn’t want to rearrange our lives to pack out our house if there was no way this deal was going through.   But now the situation had changed entirely. We spent the day (Flight in Boston, I in Utah) trying to figure out what the buyer’s game was since it almost certainly wasn’t just “to purchase a new house.”

Although we hadn’t signed anything yet, we weren’t sure if we were in danger of getting ensnared in anything that might require legal assistance for extraction. In our previous conversation with the realtor about the bankruptcies, we had been told something to the effect “Well, as long as they have the money to buy your house, really, we can’t judge or discriminate.” Having been raised by a lawyer, I started thinking, “Holy crap, is there any way we could be on the hook for anything here?” I didn’t realize it might be considered discrimination to not want to sell my house to a felon. Sorry, alleged felon.

This is totally surreal.

Fortunately, after we requested an additional qualification letter from a different lender, one our broker trusts, the potential buyer rescinded the offer stating we were “taking too long” in signing the paperwork. After tapping into our extensive legal and real estate network (neither professional is licensed in Maryland), we were assured that because we hadn’t signed anything, we weren’t on the hook for anything. Maybe it was only coincidence that the buyer’s agent had her identity stolen the following day. I’ll be sure to let you know if the Angel tells me differently.

 

 

This is SO NOT the Place…

Or is it? Wow, did Park City show nicely. Sorry, I’ve got a little Real Estate on my mind (I’ll come back to that…).

I should back up and give a little (of my) Utah history here. In 1847, when the Mormon gaggle made it from Nauvoo, IL, to the Salt Lake Valley, Brigham Young is quoted as having said, “This is the Place.” He was badly taken with Rocky Mountain Spotted Fever (brutal) and uttered this assessment from the bed of a wagon (even more brutal), but, really, what’s not to love? A beautiful lake (although I bet it was quite a surprise when they learned it was saltier than the ocean…) surrounded by mountains. It really is a gorgeous setting.

The problem is the people – as kind as they tend to be (and we’re related to many of them), there are simply too many (and they keep multiplying!) and they are putting out lots of pollution. When I was teaching at the U, I observed to a native Ute that the smog was getting pretty nasty. My observation was corrected out of hand, “That’s not smog, that’s the inversion layer.” Um, no, actually the nasty brownish grey haze hanging over the city IS smog and it’s here DUE TO the inversion layer. I may have not performed brilliantly in flight school meteorology, but I know smog when I see it.  It looks a little something like this:

Smog over SLC
Photo by Steve Griffin of the Salt Lake Tribune

One thing that stands out about Utah is that there are some things that have been very well marketed to the general public that just simply are a certain way and you can’t seem to change anyone’s perspective on the matter. They appear to have been Jedi Mind Tricked into not seeing the smog for what it is. How did this happen? I know not. Again, I suspect brilliant marketing. Back in the day, my fellow Lieutenant at the NROTC Unit and I were commiserating on our frustration with that particular Utahism and he jokingly offered, “This is So Not the Place,” which became one of our favorite encapsulating comments. The funny thing is he never left Utah and we’re considering returning…

Which brings me to the macro perspective on this whole evolution…

In addition to it just being a good time to be able to take advantage of this window of opportunity (further discussed here and here), we are trying out a few places across the country to see where we might end up next. Most people stay where they were raised for any number of reasons and/or will move to a location for a job. Flight and I are uniquely blessed (?) in that we are no longer tied to any particular location for our monetary compensation (Flight can commute to work from anywhere (even Marquette, MI!) and I can hang a shingle in most places), which means the biggest obstacle we face in choosing to live just about anywhere is paralysis by choice.   We’ve become so accustomed to having Uncle Sam dictate our location and carving out our best lives there, it’s something entirely new to have no one corralling our thoughts on where to raise our family.

I realize that in the grand scheme of problems, this one hardly merits mention, but it is one with which we are currently wrestling…

We had a list of about a handful of places we were seriously considering before launching on this deployment when Flight ran into an old squadron mate at an airport (this happens pretty frequently for pilots). Our friend told Flight that he and his family had been living in Paris for the last year and they liked it so much they may stay for another. !!! Holy cow, really? Paris?! Their kids were in French schools, loving it, and they were all thriving. Hmm… The potential footprint for our next sticks and bricks address just grew by a few countries.

We have two schools of thought really: 1) live within a couple hour drive from Boston, where Flight is currently based and has great seniority (= he gets his schedule of choice) and 2) hang the commute and live where we’d want to vacation. The first of these means we’d see Flight more (we do like him) and the second means we would see him less (but we’d be living on vacation, so would we really miss him?).  Ideally we’d find a place that’s relatively near Boston and is where we’d like to vacation (= a place fostering our thriving). We just haven’t spent enough time in that area yet to see if Shangri La exists, but Flight and I are both feeling the pull of the West Coast. Or at least West of the Rockies. Or just not in Davidsonville. Sigh…

Some of the best advice I’ve heard about figuring out where to live (Thanks, Colonel!) is to first decide what you want your life to look like and then go find a place that makes it possible. It’s the what that’s the hard part to sort out, and, once you define that nebulous concept (so I’m told), the where will take care of itself. This deployment evolution is helping me remember what feeds my soul and what does not. For example, having easy access to breathtaking hikes is important to me, as is the opportunity to be near water, type unspecified but preferably not brackish inlets pretending to be rivers. Where we were in Maryland, it required a major time commitment to get out into nature and, invariably, half of Del-Mar-Va was trying to enjoy the same spot with you, the collective impact of which meant there were few such excursions. Bummer.

Speaking of Maryland, we got word that our potential buyer has accepted our counter-offer to pay a higher price and have us cover some of the closing costs – and will be sending the contract our way over the holiday weekend for our signatures. Whoa, it’s really happening! Hoo boy. Need to rejigger our upcoming plans…